Henry

A few years ago I had dedicated myself to daily spending time in prayer, in the word, and in keeping a journal. I try not to glamorize that time because I wasn't always perfectly consistent and everything wasn't always hunky-dory, but I remember feeling closer to God. I remember seeing people differently. What I would say and do seemed to have a greater impact on people's lives. I had a deeper sense of contentment. I had more energy and self-control.

But all of that seemed to fade when I stopped. It was a gradual process with moments of brief resurgence, but the fruit withered when I neglected to root myself deeply in Love.

Last weekend, I met a man named Henry began chatting with me as we waited in line. I don’t really remember how our talk quickly turned from waiting-in-line-chit-chat, to a deep and challenging conversation about life. He told me how he gets up early every morning to spend time with God. He shared with me how he has spent time journaling and praying and reading his bible for the last four years and how that has changed his life. His marriage is stronger now that it ever was. He is a better father than he was. His criticism for others has turned to love and acceptance. He loves God and knows His love like never before.

I made a promise to Henry that day. I promised to spend about an hour each morning of the week in devotion to God. There is this huge part of me that feels silly and apprehensive for even making a promise like that - or for writing it in here for that matter. I have made and broken so many promises. I long so deeply for the ability or the dependence necessary to transform ‘impact’ into lasting change.

Sustain me Lord, I pray.